St. Louis "The Machine" Mike Paone caught High on Drugs Swimming Naked with Polar Bears at St. Louis Zoo
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Mike Paone age 41 was caught Sunday morning at 3a.m. high on illegal hallucinagetic mushrooms and swimming naked with the polar bears at the St. Louis Zoo. Police were called to the intersection of Hampton and Park ave by three seperate party's who all told 911dispatch they witnessed a naked white male running northbound on Hampton ave towards Forrest Park yelling repeatedly "Lookout folks Norman the Polar bear stole my moondust!" By the time St. Louis City officers found Mike Paone (AKA) "The Machine" he was stark naked in the Polar Bears den swimming with the deadly animals while throwing stolen Snickers bars at the penguins. After being taxed by the responding officers for not complying Paone was brought to Barnes hospital on kingshwy where after 14 hours of being strapped down he admitted to police he always wanted to do drugs with Zoo animals and throw candy around while admiring his hot chiseled naked body.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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