Binghamton man arrested for violation of sobriety
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A Binghamton man was arrested Monday for a violation of sobriety, a law thought to have been rendered obsolete. Edward Hickey Jr., was found completely and utterly sober and boring, despite being the alleged owner of the almost famous Belmar Pub in Binghamton. Witnesses were heard chanting "WE MISS OLD ED", as shots of Jameson Whiskey were poured and no fucks were given. Former mayoral candidate, Hickey, was released on his own recognizance, stating, "fuck bitches, get money". The investigation is ongoing.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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