Clinton demands recount for Times Person of the Year award
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
2059 16304 Shares
Yesterday in another blow to the Clintons, Time Magazine announced that Donald Trump would be their person of the year for 2016, with Hillary Clinton being the runner up. On an online poll conducted by the magazine, Donald Trump secured more votes than Hillary Clinton but now the Clinton’s are contesting this.
According to sources Hillary Clinton was furious with this result, expecting her face to be adorning the cover of Time Magazine and not Donald Trumps. Her Director of Communication Jennifer Palmieri agreed, stating “We find the decision of Time to put a sexist racist like Trump on their cover deplorable. We won the popular vote and the person of the year award is not decided on electoral votes, but on popular votes, so we should have won.”
Jill Stein, the mastermind behind the Michigan recount which saw Hillary Clinton’s popular vote increase by an impressive 5 votes agreed with this and is apparently lending herself to the campaign, claiming the Russian’s somehow tampered with the Time votes.
In other news, Kayne West, who hopes to be the Democrat Nominee for 2020 was also said to be disappointed, expecting his face to be on the cover of the magazine. He is currently running a GoFundMe campaign in the hopes of earning enough money to force a recount, as well as pay for his outstanding bill from his recent staying in a mental institution.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
Most Popular
-
1
bigfoot sighting at jackson lake campground near oak hill ohio
Several eye witness reported seeing a large hairy animal of some kind near the Jackson lake campground. Local authorities are asking people to be cautious if you are planning on fishing near this area. One of the witnesses where able to snap a picture with their cell phone before the creature ran away near the Tommy Been rd area.
-
2
new york city woman loses her temper, causes black hole to swallow her entire town
Anna, 26, of New York City, DC was in the middle of an argument with a colleague when her temper got so out of control, it formed a small black hole, which demolished the vast majority of her neighborhood. "I just couldn't take it anymore, and unleashed my forces at the person who was irritating me. I had no idea the energy of my rage could cause such destruction," says Anna. Despite the ruination her anger has caused, Anna says she has no regrets. "I actually wish I knew I had this ability sooner!" Anna laughs. "There are a lot of people and things I could have eradicated from my life in this way."
-
3
whale spotted in illinois river
A humpback whale was spotted near Morris IL in the Illinois River today. The sighting comes just days after 2 Great White Sharks were seen frolicking in the same area. While not impossible, it does seem unlikely. It is thought that the whale may have followed the sharks as they sometimes do in the wild. The whale would of had to travel over 1250 miles to get to this location. The Marine Biologist Association will be in town for a full investigation. Until we have answers, we are asking folks to keep their pontoons and fishing boats docked.
-
4
two great white sharks found swimming in mississippi river near saint louis, missouri.
While it is not entirely impossible, it is incredibly uncommon for salt water dwelling creatures to stay for lengthy periods of time in fresh water. However, two Great White Sharks have managed to survive the trip and make their way up the Mississippi River somehow. Believed to have started as a mating couple, the two are assumed to have swam the 920 mile journey from the mouth of the Mississippi River that is connected to the Gulf Of Mexico. Officials in Saint Louis have contacted the Missouri Conservation Department and will likely have a team in the river soon to capture the two lost sharks.