Chicken Bandit Apprehended
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
2059 29755 Shares
Southsuburban man due in court in relation to $10,000 worth of Popeyes Chicken tenders and seasoned fries found in home. Authorities acting on an inside tip raided the Saukvillage home of Jermaine House and found an estimated $3000 worth of Popeyes food in the residence, this came after stores General Manager whose name is being withheld noticed a huge discrepancy in inventory and sales transactions. Video surveillance was set up at the Sauk Trail location where the above House was witnessed taking numerous boxes to the trash, after further investigationit was noted the trash receptacles were empty but located directly beside it were numerous boxes of unopened chicken. Sources close to case say they witnessed him take boxes around clisung time to the dumpster but thought nothing of it. The GM says it has been going on for months now and decided to take a look into the matter after a decline in sales and customer complaints about 3pc meals only having 1 or 2 strips inside. We have no new leads at this time as to if House was working alone or if there'san accomplice. Well bring you up to date as we learn more.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
Most Popular
-
1
bigfoot sighting at jackson lake campground near oak hill ohio
Several eye witness reported seeing a large hairy animal of some kind near the Jackson lake campground. Local authorities are asking people to be cautious if you are planning on fishing near this area. One of the witnesses where able to snap a picture with their cell phone before the creature ran away near the Tommy Been rd area.
-
2
new york city woman loses her temper, causes black hole to swallow her entire town
Anna, 26, of New York City, DC was in the middle of an argument with a colleague when her temper got so out of control, it formed a small black hole, which demolished the vast majority of her neighborhood. "I just couldn't take it anymore, and unleashed my forces at the person who was irritating me. I had no idea the energy of my rage could cause such destruction," says Anna. Despite the ruination her anger has caused, Anna says she has no regrets. "I actually wish I knew I had this ability sooner!" Anna laughs. "There are a lot of people and things I could have eradicated from my life in this way."
-
3
whale spotted in illinois river
A humpback whale was spotted near Morris IL in the Illinois River today. The sighting comes just days after 2 Great White Sharks were seen frolicking in the same area. While not impossible, it does seem unlikely. It is thought that the whale may have followed the sharks as they sometimes do in the wild. The whale would of had to travel over 1250 miles to get to this location. The Marine Biologist Association will be in town for a full investigation. Until we have answers, we are asking folks to keep their pontoons and fishing boats docked.
-
4
two great white sharks found swimming in mississippi river near saint louis, missouri.
While it is not entirely impossible, it is incredibly uncommon for salt water dwelling creatures to stay for lengthy periods of time in fresh water. However, two Great White Sharks have managed to survive the trip and make their way up the Mississippi River somehow. Believed to have started as a mating couple, the two are assumed to have swam the 920 mile journey from the mouth of the Mississippi River that is connected to the Gulf Of Mexico. Officials in Saint Louis have contacted the Missouri Conservation Department and will likely have a team in the river soon to capture the two lost sharks.